Archive for April, 2004


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I find most things that end in a hard K sound unpleasant, and feel that if we simply attached a Y to the end they’d be much more bearable… for instance, rocks suck. Sure, they provide slingshot ammo, but they also get kicked up by the truck in front of you and crizack your windshield… add a Y and !bam! we have Rocky, Sylvester Stallone’s finest roll (excluding Judge Dredd). Who the hell am I kidding? Worky still blows. Over at GameStop I’ve been telling kids that Halo2 will come pre-installed on the harddrive of your XBox2, giving you something to play right away, complete and total fabrication. One day I hope to join the Arby’s Chicken & Swiss Club.

I think maybe I’ll buy Phantasy Star Online Episodes 1 & 2 for GameCube along with the Broadband adapter, then I could install Linux on my modded XBox and use it to rip and stream .dol files over an RJ-45 X-cable, firmly establishing myself as the Pirate King of Carroll County

Hmm… I need to read up on that when I get home.

My XBox is hella sexy… Ashley’s godbrother’s LJ… his girlfriend is hot… where have all the children gone? Graveyards, one by one. The killing won’t stop unless we stop it. Call 1-800-WE-PREVENT. I’m not sure why, but the public service message from the US Department of Justice told me so via the radio, so do it, punk.

Was supposed to go to a party with Nick, bastard never called me ­čśë

Went to a party with Erik, it sucked so we left.

Going to New York on Friday!!!

People make me sad

Sure most’ve the links are broken, and the comments have long-since expired, but this page now contains over 1 year’s worth of entries. I kinda wish I hadn’t deleted the earlier posts last April, but its a little difficult to be a revisionary historian when a factual record of things which transpired are publicly available. Not that it stops politicians, but still, I’d like to think I’m slightly better than that, in the same way yellow american cheese is better than the white variety.

So now, I present to you, loyal EmoryM readers, my 4 predictions for the following year:

1) Going back to college, somewhere

2) Moving

3) 1 or 2 failed relationships

4) TV’s Mr. Belding will DIB

5) My kbyboard will gbt fixbd.

Aww damn, thats fivb.

Tuesday I worked both jobs (thats 11 hours of serving customers, ergh)… went to a party over in Union Bridge with Erik, Katrina and Amy. We weren’t originally supposed to go, Erik was all excited about getting Kill Bill on DVD but he wanted to make Katrina happy. Anyhow, he wound up being accused of trying to watch this dousche-bag named Chad attempt the sexual intercourse with Stereotypical Drunk Girl, not cool. I think after we left said allegation morphed into Erik attempting to initiate a 3-way, judging from the semi-confused conversation he and I had this afternoon. Anyhow, I woke up in his basement at around 3, went over to Justin’s and played a bunch of Champions of Norrath. Compulsively. Oh, and drank chocolate milk… I’m not sure why, but the day after I’m always feening for some mocha-dairy, gotta love bovine lactation. Damn, got myself all hot with that one. Spider Man 2 is going to kick so much ass.



I found a photo of the waiter of the 24th and a half century!

Now seriously, who is that? (The person commenting, not the girl down with the syndrome)

Easter was alright. They released a patch for City of Heroes, now I can actually play teh beta.. which is a good thing, as is the game itself. I’ve yet to figure out how to fly, but I managed to recreate my EverQuest ShadowKnight fairly well. I also made this queer-ass looking Egyptian guy called King Kashmere, yaknow, to illustrate how kickass the character creation system is. The only problem I’ve found with the game thus-far is, basically, there are no items. There are these things called Enhancements which you attach to various skills to boost attributes, decrease mana cost, etc… Then there are inspirations, which amount to potions in the Diablo-esque sense of being fairly cheap and readily available. When you level up you either get an inherit ability (like Sprint), more enhancements slots (which you assign to skills so they can be further boosted) or new skills (from either your primary or secondary power-set… for my character, primary = broadsword and secondary = dark defense crap.) I guess since everything is based off superheroes it wouldn’t really make sense to be getting items, but still, I think this will be to the detriment of the longevity of the game. I’ve got a mouth-ulser and it really fucking hurts. This sucks. And I’m at work (clearly we’re not the busiest store in the mall) and I’ve had like zero customers for the past upteen hours.

(bitch about videogames) (bitch about something else) (witty comment)

Ok, so Dante is a playable character in the PS2 version of Viewtiful Joe? WTF?!? I mean, the guy is already going to be in the US release of Nocturne… did Devil May Cry 2 suck so badly they’re peddling around the one decent character from one quasi-popular franchise to the next? Apparently Sarah, my #1 uhh yeah, is a big slut and slept with some married 32 year old waiter. Lets analyze this bit by bit. Married? Yech. Married 32 year old? Icky. Married 32 year old WAITER? Dear lord, I ruined that girl. Ah well.

Its a timeless format, no?

I just read the comments on the post before the post I just made… uhm, anyway…

Kate, read the following:

Kate, I went to the site you had posted as a comment but found no drama. Actually, it was all pretty much mindless song-lyrics and girlitude. I was expecting some gritty details on a love-triangle, or at least compromising photos of senators with household appliances. Please IM me at once as you’ve made me all curious.

Candace, read the following:

Candace, I figured you were dead lol. Anyway, send me my necklace and disappear already… its great you’re getting out of town without coming down with the chickenpox, a herpes flare-up or whatnot, but its all-or-nothing with me. You opted for nothing. Stop reading my site, and if you must, don’t waste my time by leaving comments. It was harder to write this than it will be to read it, or something, goodbye.

Uhh, anyone left is free to read this:

If you came here by accident via googling “Gebhart blender sex” I apologize, I’m not a bad guy. Well, real bad.

Just got back from seeing Hellboy at the Town Mall of Westminster w/Justin. Actually when we showed up I heard some dude yelling “Emory”… it was Erik. Along with Katrina. Who accompanied Angela Hudgins, who was standing in front of Bonnie and Greg. Oh, and there were two other dudes… and some girl named Chris who wasn’t very attractive. Not to mention a theatre JAM-PACKED (well, sparsely) with loyal GameStop customers. How could I tell? Well, lets just say there was a stink in the air, a gamey goodness if you will. Anyway bla bla bla movie review: I give Hellboy uhh phi out of epsilon, take that as you will. I need a girlfriend, if only for social situations. And hardcore fucking…. so yeah, social situations.

I wonder if Italians like Italics.